It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
