You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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