the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize