Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
