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He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
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