wat bout pragnant strippers??
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
