I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
