Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry jaminsen hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(201): View more from New Jersey

Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.

Fav 7 4761 957
share tweet
(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...

Fav 10 3943 1472
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(417): View more from Missouri

My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.

Fav 12 4753 1670
share tweet
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....

Fav 4 1903 905
share tweet
(810): View more from Michigan

We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.

Fav 14 3753 1042
share tweet
(515): View more from Iowa

Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.

Fav 3 1753 911
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(773): View more from Illinois

Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.

Fav 11 915 1376
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(707): View more from California

I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?

(650): View more from California

There is so much wrong with that sentence

(707): View more from California

Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real

Fav 5 1405 851
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(516): View more from New York

Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?

Fav 3 80 18
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT