Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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