the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
