We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
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