bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Randomize
