i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize