I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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