is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
