More tranny stories later!
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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