At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
