So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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