Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Randomize