...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
wanna go halves on a baby?
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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