Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
