I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
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