Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
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