roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
When did angry sex become our thing?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Bring me that man meat
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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