Your mouth is God's brothel.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
You told her to step on the scale because you had whiskey goggles, and scales don't lie.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
