My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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