I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
this boner is exhausting
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
