you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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