The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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