I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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