so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
