she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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