A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
