it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
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