Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
