Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
