I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
they're like a gay fantastic four
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
