he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
North Korea, Best Korea!
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
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