I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
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