When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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