she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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