OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Randomize
