oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
