The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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