There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
