i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Watching her eat just hurts me
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
