alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
