don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
This baby is an asshole
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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