I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
