you would pick up someone in the library
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
